Thoughts and musings.
Here's a thought:
WHY THE MOTHER FUCK IS THIS COUNTRY SO GOD DAMNED BACKWARDS AND STUPID?!
Hey, James and Johnny want to get married! SO FUCKING WHAT?!
Why is it such a big god damned issue? Why can't James and Johnny get married? FUCKING WHY?!
If one more person quotes the same dusty old time that promotes slavery, sister fucking, and genocide, I'm likely to take said tome and beat them to death with it. I'm talking feeding them their own fucking teeth style beating.
Look, if you want to be Christian that's fine. If you've had some kind of divine experience, well then good for you. Go to church, read the bible instead of taking your preacher at his word (yeah fucking right), pray over your food, wear a cross...but for the love of your fairy tale god, STOP TELLING EVERYONE ELSE HOW TO FUCKING LIVE! We don't believe in the same batch of unicorn shit you do. So please do the rest of us a favor and shut your sanctimonious mouth.
Does gay marriage offend you? Who FUCKING CARES? Your entire religion offends me, but you don't hear me saying you CAN'T FUCKING GO TO CHURCH. Regardless of what I have to say, it damn sure isn't illegal!
I get so pissed off about this because of how stupid it all really is. If something offends christians, it must be wiped out. Instead of just going about their lives, they instead have to fuck with the lives of others. That infuriates me.
Oh yeah, let's not forget that inane argument that gay marriage will lead to people marrying animals and other such stupid shit. Right up front, fuck anyone who says or thinks this. Go die. Also, what's next in the banning of marriages aye? No more interracial marriage? You dirty racists! See, that can go both ways. Not only that, but my way makes a lot more sense. Go die.
Oh yeah, fuck Chick-fil-A.
That is all.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Stuff
Been a while since my last post, so fucking sue me.
I've been busy doing...stuff. Happy stuff. Yes, the Madman is actually happy. Go figure.
There are still rant-worthy things in this world, and I assure you that I will get to them in due time. This little outlet has brought me so much joy that it must be continued.
As for now, just rest assured that I haven't forgotten about this blog. I just really haven't had the time to write anything I actually like.
I'm actually brainstorming some story ideas I would like to post here and get some feedback on. So that may actually happen in the near future.
See you soon.
Fuck. It's a requirement that any post on here contain at least two fucks.
Goodnight.
I've been busy doing...stuff. Happy stuff. Yes, the Madman is actually happy. Go figure.
There are still rant-worthy things in this world, and I assure you that I will get to them in due time. This little outlet has brought me so much joy that it must be continued.
As for now, just rest assured that I haven't forgotten about this blog. I just really haven't had the time to write anything I actually like.
I'm actually brainstorming some story ideas I would like to post here and get some feedback on. So that may actually happen in the near future.
See you soon.
Fuck. It's a requirement that any post on here contain at least two fucks.
Goodnight.
Friday, July 6, 2012
Welcome Back Gentlemen
An actual keyboard. It's almost strange to have my thoughts fly out of my mind via my fingers, instead of pecking out things on a phone. True, the pecking method does allow me to think about what I'm writing much harder. When it takes that long to get a word out, you have time to debate and decide what to actually write.
I also wanted to point something out. If you are perceptive, you will have noticed that I use slightly different punctuation between the phone and the keyboard. Do you see it? Well, I'll just cue up the Jeopardy music and we'll wait. Remember to answer in the form of a question.
It's a minor thing, so don't worry about being too flaming stupid to notice, I would also be one of the flamingly stupid masses. I was taught the old rules of spacing after periods and commas. Those used on a typewriter. Two spaces after a period, one following a comma. On a phone, it is honestly easier to just allow the proper (for a computer anyway) single space following a period, but my fingers are so programmed for the double space after so many years.
Pointless fucking rambling.
And now for something completely different...
Music touches us all. No matter what kind of music you like, or even if you really don't listen to it at all, music is an integral part of your life. We hear music in ads, on TV shows, in movies, on the radio. Everything from full symphonies to those irritating god damned jingles that lodge product X in your subconscious. Music truly ties our world together. It inspires moments of pure joy, and drives us to maddening hatred.
For me, music is such an integral part of my being that I cannot imagine life without it. All it takes is hearing a certain song, and I'm transported backwards in time. Allowed to once again feel the same rush of emotion I did at 19. Music can cradle me in darkness, or lift me up out of a funk. It can make me smile, drive me to tears, and touch my life in far too many ways to list here.
With that said, perhaps some of you more seasoned readers will remember the thrill of hearing an awesome new song on the radio. In a time before anyone could just grab their phone and find whatever it is they might want to listen to, hearing a new song on the radio that stood head and shoulders above the rest got my blood pumping. Of course, I have no desire to return to said times and smash things with my club while grunting and shitting in my own hand. Poo wars!
That happened to me a couple of days ago. I had totally missed The Offspring dropping their new album. I might also have just written it off. The Offspring haven't done anything good in years. Their music used to stir something inside of me, and then came Pretty Fly (For a White Guy). Enough said on that. So imagine my surprise when I heard Dexter's unique tones wailing in and out of what was one of the best songs I had heard in quite some time. There was a moment of sheer joy. One of my favorite bands may have pulled its head from its ass, and actually created something beautiful. A song that reminds me of the old days, makes me feel young again, but in a mature way.
Days Go By.
God. Damn.
The rest of the album, also named Days Go By, does more than simply support the title track. The album builds upon the song in a big way. It becomes a ride through blessed sonic joy. It is the best thing I have heard in years. Period.
There are a couple of typically Offspring goofy songs, but they are few and far between. I've only heard two so far. Out of twelve, that isn't bad.
I'm grinning like a fucking idiot while my feet tap to a beat that also has me doing the white boy nod. Good stuff.
M'kay, enough of that unabashed fangasm. This is what music does to me when it's...just...right. Perfect. It touches something deep within me, a thing I could never describe. If anything, music is my soul.
Welcome back gentlemen, and thank you so much. I'm allowed to have idols again. Someone I can truly look up to. Someone who lost their way, but managed to claw back into my musical heart. It's no secret that I'm a bitter bastard, and you have me dancing around like a teenager again.
It is moments like this that I am reminded of just how fucking beautiful life is.
Once again something different...
Whee!
Guys, I've really been blessed with some awesome people reading this blog. People I had no idea would even be interested in anything I might have to say. I really hope you are enjoying yourself, and I really appreciate you taking your time to read my drivel. Time is precious, and not to be wasted. I'm glad you don't feel I am a waste. That's pretty much it really, I just wanted to say thank you.
I hope to keep pumping this shit out as often as I can formulate coherent thoughts. It is becoming easier every time, and I'm really having a fucking ball with this. Thanks for the support.
Okay enough emotional shit...
I'm really feeling some nasty shit brewing in the depths of my mind, and Piss Off All the Fuckers needs another episode. Yup.
Goodnight.
I also wanted to point something out. If you are perceptive, you will have noticed that I use slightly different punctuation between the phone and the keyboard. Do you see it? Well, I'll just cue up the Jeopardy music and we'll wait. Remember to answer in the form of a question.
It's a minor thing, so don't worry about being too flaming stupid to notice, I would also be one of the flamingly stupid masses. I was taught the old rules of spacing after periods and commas. Those used on a typewriter. Two spaces after a period, one following a comma. On a phone, it is honestly easier to just allow the proper (for a computer anyway) single space following a period, but my fingers are so programmed for the double space after so many years.
Pointless fucking rambling.
And now for something completely different...
Music touches us all. No matter what kind of music you like, or even if you really don't listen to it at all, music is an integral part of your life. We hear music in ads, on TV shows, in movies, on the radio. Everything from full symphonies to those irritating god damned jingles that lodge product X in your subconscious. Music truly ties our world together. It inspires moments of pure joy, and drives us to maddening hatred.
For me, music is such an integral part of my being that I cannot imagine life without it. All it takes is hearing a certain song, and I'm transported backwards in time. Allowed to once again feel the same rush of emotion I did at 19. Music can cradle me in darkness, or lift me up out of a funk. It can make me smile, drive me to tears, and touch my life in far too many ways to list here.
With that said, perhaps some of you more seasoned readers will remember the thrill of hearing an awesome new song on the radio. In a time before anyone could just grab their phone and find whatever it is they might want to listen to, hearing a new song on the radio that stood head and shoulders above the rest got my blood pumping. Of course, I have no desire to return to said times and smash things with my club while grunting and shitting in my own hand. Poo wars!
That happened to me a couple of days ago. I had totally missed The Offspring dropping their new album. I might also have just written it off. The Offspring haven't done anything good in years. Their music used to stir something inside of me, and then came Pretty Fly (For a White Guy). Enough said on that. So imagine my surprise when I heard Dexter's unique tones wailing in and out of what was one of the best songs I had heard in quite some time. There was a moment of sheer joy. One of my favorite bands may have pulled its head from its ass, and actually created something beautiful. A song that reminds me of the old days, makes me feel young again, but in a mature way.
Days Go By.
God. Damn.
The rest of the album, also named Days Go By, does more than simply support the title track. The album builds upon the song in a big way. It becomes a ride through blessed sonic joy. It is the best thing I have heard in years. Period.
There are a couple of typically Offspring goofy songs, but they are few and far between. I've only heard two so far. Out of twelve, that isn't bad.
I'm grinning like a fucking idiot while my feet tap to a beat that also has me doing the white boy nod. Good stuff.
M'kay, enough of that unabashed fangasm. This is what music does to me when it's...just...right. Perfect. It touches something deep within me, a thing I could never describe. If anything, music is my soul.
Welcome back gentlemen, and thank you so much. I'm allowed to have idols again. Someone I can truly look up to. Someone who lost their way, but managed to claw back into my musical heart. It's no secret that I'm a bitter bastard, and you have me dancing around like a teenager again.
It is moments like this that I am reminded of just how fucking beautiful life is.
Once again something different...
Whee!
Guys, I've really been blessed with some awesome people reading this blog. People I had no idea would even be interested in anything I might have to say. I really hope you are enjoying yourself, and I really appreciate you taking your time to read my drivel. Time is precious, and not to be wasted. I'm glad you don't feel I am a waste. That's pretty much it really, I just wanted to say thank you.
I hope to keep pumping this shit out as often as I can formulate coherent thoughts. It is becoming easier every time, and I'm really having a fucking ball with this. Thanks for the support.
Okay enough emotional shit...
I'm really feeling some nasty shit brewing in the depths of my mind, and Piss Off All the Fuckers needs another episode. Yup.
Goodnight.
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
America, Fuck Yeah!
After that, I always have to over dramatically sing, "we're on our way to save the motherfuck'n day yeah!"
So, America. Yeah. I don't care what anyone says, I fucking love this place. Not where you expected this to go, is it?
There are some amazing countries in the first world, and like it or not we're one of them.
Is America perfect? Well fuck no. Is the South a stinking pit of illiteracy? Yup! I still love it too, just wish it would bathe more often and cut its fucking mullet.
Where else can my primary stress come from a regular job that pays well? I have a roof over my head, food to eat, clean water to drink, and a giant TV to fucking worship. I have a car, spending money, and this fucking magical phone to play on.
Life is good.
This place is worth fighting for. I don't just mean in the traditional military sense either, although I highly respect the men and women in uniform. This country is sliding into decay, and god fucking damnit it is worth saving! The apathy and angst destroying us need to be molded into more productive mindsets.
So you hate the government, vote. Do your goddamn research. Make your voice heard. Make informed decisions on every level of government, local to federal. Vote god damnit. I know it often doesn't seem to make a difference, but if enough us get involved, we can change that. It's all up to us.
Well dear readers, I'm headin out to see some old friends. I intend to feed my happiness and good cheer with alcohol and awesome company this day, and what a glorious day it shall be.
Happy birthday America, you mangy fucking mutt I can't help but love.
So, America. Yeah. I don't care what anyone says, I fucking love this place. Not where you expected this to go, is it?
There are some amazing countries in the first world, and like it or not we're one of them.
Is America perfect? Well fuck no. Is the South a stinking pit of illiteracy? Yup! I still love it too, just wish it would bathe more often and cut its fucking mullet.
Where else can my primary stress come from a regular job that pays well? I have a roof over my head, food to eat, clean water to drink, and a giant TV to fucking worship. I have a car, spending money, and this fucking magical phone to play on.
Life is good.
This place is worth fighting for. I don't just mean in the traditional military sense either, although I highly respect the men and women in uniform. This country is sliding into decay, and god fucking damnit it is worth saving! The apathy and angst destroying us need to be molded into more productive mindsets.
So you hate the government, vote. Do your goddamn research. Make your voice heard. Make informed decisions on every level of government, local to federal. Vote god damnit. I know it often doesn't seem to make a difference, but if enough us get involved, we can change that. It's all up to us.
Well dear readers, I'm headin out to see some old friends. I intend to feed my happiness and good cheer with alcohol and awesome company this day, and what a glorious day it shall be.
Happy birthday America, you mangy fucking mutt I can't help but love.
Little Yellow Pad
My little yellow pad. On a fucking phone. I often forget the magical device I now hold in my hands.
You see folks, I have mainly pecked out this blog on my iPhone. That's boring shit you don't really need to know, but there it is. Yay!
Getting back to getting back all of a sudden, as a dear, but very worthless friend of mine always said.
Magic!
I fucking hold magic in my hands. This social device has transcended its meager beginnings of being packed into suitcases, and now become a device I literally rely on in my daily life.
I never did get my god DAMNED jet pack, or flying car. I do however, have a thing that would drive science fiction writers of the past to premature deaths by unending orgasm.
I am living in the god damned future, and it's full of cats! Imagine trying to explain that shit to an earlier version of yourself. Wouldn't go down pretty I imagine, but past me is a dick, so there is that.
The future! This fucking "phone" can do far more shit than my first computer that was connected to that screeching, abysmally slow thing we used to call the Internet. Minutes for a single porn picture, obtained from IRC. Truly the Dark Ages. Hell for a fifteen year old boy.
I can look up anything I desire. No piece of trivia goes unanswered. That one song I used to love is no longer an eternal mystery. Music, movies, social interaction, and yes even porn is all merely a few pecks away.
This god damned thing is amazing. Fucking magic.
Who would have ever imagined that phones would be the technology that most shapes humanity? That phones, fucking phones would be the thing that changes our every day lives the most within our age?
Ponder on that for a while.
Goodnight.
You see folks, I have mainly pecked out this blog on my iPhone. That's boring shit you don't really need to know, but there it is. Yay!
Getting back to getting back all of a sudden, as a dear, but very worthless friend of mine always said.
Magic!
I fucking hold magic in my hands. This social device has transcended its meager beginnings of being packed into suitcases, and now become a device I literally rely on in my daily life.
I never did get my god DAMNED jet pack, or flying car. I do however, have a thing that would drive science fiction writers of the past to premature deaths by unending orgasm.
I am living in the god damned future, and it's full of cats! Imagine trying to explain that shit to an earlier version of yourself. Wouldn't go down pretty I imagine, but past me is a dick, so there is that.
The future! This fucking "phone" can do far more shit than my first computer that was connected to that screeching, abysmally slow thing we used to call the Internet. Minutes for a single porn picture, obtained from IRC. Truly the Dark Ages. Hell for a fifteen year old boy.
I can look up anything I desire. No piece of trivia goes unanswered. That one song I used to love is no longer an eternal mystery. Music, movies, social interaction, and yes even porn is all merely a few pecks away.
This god damned thing is amazing. Fucking magic.
Who would have ever imagined that phones would be the technology that most shapes humanity? That phones, fucking phones would be the thing that changes our every day lives the most within our age?
Ponder on that for a while.
Goodnight.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Happy Fun Blog Time!
Oh yay, it's happy fun blog time everyone! Isn't that special? Whee!
Didn't really feel like doing another episode of Piss Off All the Fuckers tonight. This will be a positive blog! *cough's bullshit*
Yeah, you knew better didn't you? Hope so. I think I once posted something on here mainly consisting of the word fuck. Or is that every time? Who fucking cares?
Tonight's fuck filled adventure will be into the world of gay marriage. A thing surrounded in controversy for some god damned reason.
So let's dive right in. Get straight to the point. Who fucking cares? I mean really, who fucking cares either way?
Some people want to marry each other, and...yeah thats pretty much it. No fall of fucking society. No rape of traditional marriage. It's a goddamn nonissue people.
Let us dig a little deeper. Some book says that gay people are evil. It probably says this on the same page it describes the laws of slavery, and pretty much relegates women to slave status.
Come the fuck on.
The vast majority of hate for gay people and their lifestyle can be traced right back to A FUCKING BOOK! Can no one else see just how god damned ridiculous this is? A BOOK! ITS A FUCKING BOOK! Words on paper people. These words, nor the paper they are printed on are blessed by some bald fuck in the sky. If they are, he is one petty mother fucker. Please refer to one of my previous posts for thoughts on that subject.
Also, how in the name of fuck can letting gay people marry hurt "traditional" marriage? Straight people have pretty much murdered that one on their own. At this point I'm not sure there is much that can make the institution of marriage look any less appealing.
By the way, if one more person says that it will lead to people marrying animals and inanimate objects, I will likely shoot said person in the face with my trusty, rusty harpoon. Go die you moron. How can you possibly compare crazy shit like that with two consenting adults?
There are far more important things in the world to worry about. Fuck me, there are more important things in my current vicinity to worry about. What song Pandora is playing, what video game might interest me, what crazy cat picture to look at next. I think you see my point. This "issue" does not even show up on my radar. I cannot be bothered to care. Can't bring myself to give a fuck.
That's pretty much it. I don't fucking care who is getting married. Have fun and good luck. From what I've seen, you'll need it.
Goodnight.
Didn't really feel like doing another episode of Piss Off All the Fuckers tonight. This will be a positive blog! *cough's bullshit*
Yeah, you knew better didn't you? Hope so. I think I once posted something on here mainly consisting of the word fuck. Or is that every time? Who fucking cares?
Tonight's fuck filled adventure will be into the world of gay marriage. A thing surrounded in controversy for some god damned reason.
So let's dive right in. Get straight to the point. Who fucking cares? I mean really, who fucking cares either way?
Some people want to marry each other, and...yeah thats pretty much it. No fall of fucking society. No rape of traditional marriage. It's a goddamn nonissue people.
Let us dig a little deeper. Some book says that gay people are evil. It probably says this on the same page it describes the laws of slavery, and pretty much relegates women to slave status.
Come the fuck on.
The vast majority of hate for gay people and their lifestyle can be traced right back to A FUCKING BOOK! Can no one else see just how god damned ridiculous this is? A BOOK! ITS A FUCKING BOOK! Words on paper people. These words, nor the paper they are printed on are blessed by some bald fuck in the sky. If they are, he is one petty mother fucker. Please refer to one of my previous posts for thoughts on that subject.
Also, how in the name of fuck can letting gay people marry hurt "traditional" marriage? Straight people have pretty much murdered that one on their own. At this point I'm not sure there is much that can make the institution of marriage look any less appealing.
By the way, if one more person says that it will lead to people marrying animals and inanimate objects, I will likely shoot said person in the face with my trusty, rusty harpoon. Go die you moron. How can you possibly compare crazy shit like that with two consenting adults?
There are far more important things in the world to worry about. Fuck me, there are more important things in my current vicinity to worry about. What song Pandora is playing, what video game might interest me, what crazy cat picture to look at next. I think you see my point. This "issue" does not even show up on my radar. I cannot be bothered to care. Can't bring myself to give a fuck.
That's pretty much it. I don't fucking care who is getting married. Have fun and good luck. From what I've seen, you'll need it.
Goodnight.
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