New and Shiny

Fuck, fucking, fuckity, fuck fuck fuck!

There, now that you know what to expect, allow me to introduce you to my new blog.  I have pondered over how to start a blog for quite some time now, and I think that pretty much sums up exactly what this blog will be about.  My thoughts, my musings, take on religion (oh, get ready baby), politics (*insert video of a nuclear blast here*), and cats with their faces shoved into a piece of bread (seriously, WTF?).

I honestly have no idea what this will evolve into.  I can only say that the title is very fitting.  Madness ensues.  I will not hold back.  I will not concern myself with the feelings of others, no matter how loved (sorry Sis, I did warn you).  I will tear into everything I possibly can, with absolutely no rhyme nor reason, and most likely abuse the English language as I often do myself.  That is to say unmercifully, and unashamedly.

If you don't like it, fuck off.  If you do, fuck right on in.  By the way, I adore the word fuck.  It is the most versatile word in the entirety of the English language, and thus deserves to be used as often as possible.  FUCK.  Yeah.

I'm currently perched on a cheap ass fold out couch my room mate so lovingly allowed me to lay my head upon when I fall into that comatose state known as sleep.  Otherwise I would be laying my over-sized cranium (HEED! PANTS! NOW! - lets see who catches that movie reference) upon the floor.  Our new apartment has very nice carpet by the way.  My computer sits with it's case torn open and exposed to the world (fucking POS overheats otherwise), much like the neurons of my brain seem to be when exposed to the sheer amount of human stupidity I am exposed to daily.  The monitor rests upon a cheap ass, plastic chest of drawers...thing.  I have no idea what it is besides a WalMart-special storage bin.  Yet again, donated by my awesome room mate.  I have little to my name, besides a history of stupid fucking decisions that have led to my current lot in life.  That is a tale to be expounded upon in this blog, however.  No need to blow my load so soon.  I will say that women will be the fucking death of me.  My keyboard rests upon my knees.  Look mom, I can type without looking!

Where the fuck was I?

Um....fuck.

Should I even keep this stupid fucking ramble going?  Oh, fuck yes!  The rum flows through my veins, and the nicotine dangles from my lips.  The Sisters of Mercy moan their gothy bullshit into my ears.  The time for rambling is at hand.

No, wait.  YouTube has decided that I need to hear yet another godforsaken ad, followed by the sweet sound of...The Cult.  FUCK YES!  Fuck yes to The Cult - She Sells Sanctuary, not the ad that reminds me of my age and just how much I have grown to loathe the internet.  I can remember a time when YouTube didn't try to sell me shit.  I can remember a time when the internet was a land of pure freedom, and not infected by the perversion of Capitalism our society has embraced.  Again, more on that later.

Oh yay!  Another ad I pay no attention to, besides that fucking annoying female singsong voice.  Goddamn fuck.  Oh wait, it's followed by more Cult.  Yeah!

Damn, I just keep typing.  When will this end?  Who fucking knows.  When I get tired and decide to use this fucking couch thing for sleep instead of using it as my pedestal for drunken ranting.

FIRE WOMAN!  If you don't know this song, you are dead to me.  Get off my goddamn planet.

Oh yeah, blog.

Um...well fuck, I don't know.  Enjoy, or don't.  This isn't for you, it's for me.  This blog may or may not be easier to follow in the future.  I may just be this shit-hammered when I decide to post again.  I promise no schedule whatsoever.  I mean, read the fucking title.  Thoughts and Musings of a Madman.  That really should tell you something.  I'm cutting loose.  I just don't fucking care what anyone thinks anymore.  The insanity lurking within the confines of my mind demands release.

I could probably keep this going for quite some time, but Ian Astbury has reminded me that I really want to be a rock star.  Too bad I can't sing, or play any instrument.  Fuck it, I'll just drink a bit more and drift off into a fantasy of being on stage, rocking out in front of thousands of adoring fans.  Who hasn't had that fantasy?  Pussies.

Ok, moment of clarity time.  If you have made it this far, I hope to have shocked you either into reading this blog, or fucking right off.  Yes, fuck really is my favorite word.  Yes, I am likely batshit insane (read the fucking title!).  Yes, this will be a lot of goddamn fun.  For me at least, hopefully for you as well.  I do hope to make the blog itself much more coherent, though even more shocking because of it.  If you are offended already, then good fucking luck.  If not, come with me.  We will explore the rabbit hole together.

Good night.  Good day.  Whatever applies.